[Ben Reeve Lewis considers both ends of the housing spectrum…..]
I’ve noticed lately a trend in my newsround column for my eye to be drawn to contrasting ends of the housing spectrum.
The opposite ends of housing
I love property porn websites like ‘Curbed’ where wonderful New England clapboard houses rub shoulders with glass and chrome Kensington penthouses or open sided Mojave desert boltholes offering stunning sunsets with Zen gardens.
Sad man that I am I actually, like many others I’m sure, day dream about living in such fantastic spacious environments with no worries about paying bills.
Unlike my overpriced 1 bedroom South London flat with a patio garden no bigger than the average double bed.
But at the same time I work every day in places that would make Charles Dickens and John Stuart Mill cry for the lack of impact their lives made on housing for the poor 150 years later.
Cockroach city …
Last Friday night I went with police to an off licence with residential accommodation above it.
You couldn’t walk across the floor of the residential basement without crunching over more cockroach shells than I have ever seen, and I’ve seen a few.
Upstairs I actually gasped for a second upon encountering an old fella who for a second I genuinely thought was dead. He had no legs and was paralysed and laying in a sort of truncated cot affair. Living in one room with his elderly wife and an electricity supply so dangerous it had to be disconnected.
Returning home at midnight to cuddle up to the missus and quaff a glass of Jack Daniels (alright….half a bottle) I mused, not for the first time, about how a human being can face their family knowing that the bread on their table is put there by rents paid for properties like the one I had just spent three hours in.
We at least can afford our overpriced rabbit hutch and have the knowledge and confidence to challenge a shyster who might try and pull the wool over our eyes. Many don’t have the wherewithal.
So I oscillate between the Central Park lofts of my dreams and the reality of London renting 2015 style for those below the breadline exploited by people with the moral compass of a slice of Battenburg.
Life in the square
Searching for a middle ground counterpoint and the people who live there I read Author Rosie Millard’s amusing piece in the Telegraph about her upcoming novel about life for residents in a trendy London square which I have to say sounds less than attractive.
“Conformity in behaviour is as important as the look of the houses, with their white facades and black railings – There’s also the undercurrent of anxieties and frustrations in our square: from competition over where you send your children to school to arguments about noise (dogs, burglar alarms, parties) to rows over au pairs and jealousy over holiday plans”
Sounds ghastly….
Rosie ends her article with:
“Because everyone lives on top of each other, domestic concerns are the major topics of conversation. My novel examines attitudes to money and sex, but I could have investigated the private school debate or the row over who had fake grass in their garden.”
Scintillating.
Rent for sex
Staying with London and specifically local to me I read this week of a Catford landlord being convicted of sexually assaulting a tenant.
The address isn’t far from my office but the complaint didn’t come my way and the landlord wasn’t known to us. (I checked).
The story, covered by International Business Times expanded further on this worrying development to report on other incidents of a similar nature
I recall several months back reporting on a growing trend of seedy landlords exploiting the housing crisis by offering rent free or low rent opportunities in return for sexual favours but reports keep growing apace.
IB Times tells us about the advert “Looking for a slutty girl who wants to stay rent free in Zone 1” the landlord breezily pitching himself as follows:
“Above the advert are two pictures of a middle aged man. He is tanned and topless in one, wearing garish orange shorts and posing in front of the MI6 building on the Thames. His name, it transpires, is Rod.”
Topless? Tanned? Orange shorts? Called ‘Rod’?………surely not he of the Maggie May fame? The rest of the description fits.
How on earth do you get away with posing topless in orange shorts outside of MI6 anyway? I’m amazed he didn’t disappear under a bundle of armed guards.
My warped humour aside it is actually a terrible sign of how far people will go to exploit others in desperate need and the IB Times article points out that advertising property in return for sexual favours would in fact be a criminal offence under the Sexual Offences Act 2003, notably Section 52, which concerns itself with incitement to prostitution and S54 (a) which very clearly says:
“Any financial advantage, including the discharge of an obligation to pay or the provision of goods or services (including sexual services) gratuitously or at a discount.”
Free rent for sex?…..I have a few contenders in that department.
Estate Agent Today this week told us of an impending ITV gameshow “Guess this House” where contestants vie with estate agents to accurately estimate the price of a house at sale.
Turn the volume of your TV down, lean in and listen very carefully……..If you are really paying attention you will hear the delicate sound of barrels being scraped.
Can you imagine a more inane programme?
We all do it but do you want to be entertained by watching people doing the same thing we do whilst flicking through the local paper?
A clear sign of the times we live in, where homes take second place to investment opportunities.
I would love them to visit my legless guy in the cockroach festooned room and ask the contestants to guess the price of the rent. I think a few smiles would freeze on faces to be honest. Even Dale Winton would struggle to put a charm spin on that.
What made me smile this week
Frazzy’s mate Cindy.
Many years ago Frazz was a resident travel person in Hong Kong, living there for months at a time where she met Cindy and stayed friends.
I’d never met her and was a bit subdued at the news she would be staying with us overnight, picturing myself having to force conversation with (my own stereotyping) a quiet, overly polite oriental lady.
In reality she turned out to be a loud, gobby, foulmouthed and sarcastic woman. Just the sort of person I enjoy hanging out with.
Isnt it great to have your preconceptions challenged?
See ya next week.
Back when I was living in Hackney, about a year ago, I saw a card in a shop window from a Gerry in Walthamstow advertising “RENT AND FOOD FREE” accommodation for a childless woman only on the stipulation that she “must perform all wifely duties.”
Alarmingly, I know someone called Gerry who lives in Walthamstow but it wasn’t him, thankfully.
Hello Ben,
What is the non-PRS housing news saying about the tax deductibility of mortgage payments in the budget? I rely on your newsround to keep me up to date!
This will have a huge effect on the poorest renters, similar to the benefit changes.
All I’ve heard is “bad for landlords = good for renters”.
It ain’t, unless you are willing and able to buy.
Not fishing for landlord sympathy BTW, Ill be OK (in case you were worried!).
So were you able to move the old couple out of the property? Prosecute the landlord?
Hi! Sex for rent? It happens. http://rentergirl.blogspot.co.uk/2013/11/who-pays-tallyman.html I have never had such outraged comments from people who think I make these up up, inventing exploitation rather than documenting it. How are you BTW?
“I have never had such outraged comments from people”
C’mon Penny. There was only one mildly outraged comment and they just posted it as ‘anonymous’.
“How are you HBTW?”
I’m good, thanks.
Although we might not always agree, I’m very happy that you are still around.