[Ben Reeve Lewis is fed up with the Brexit news…)
Oh can anyone be arsed to comment further on the EU????? I have my views but I’m fed up of hearing more doom and gloom.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s fascinating stuff. The closest we’ve come to a revolution since 1649 and I follow it avidly but
- we aren’t sleeping in cardboard boxes,
- we aren’t drowning in a refugee boat off the coast of Italy,
- we aren’t being bombed by fighter jets like the poor buggers in Syria,
- we aren’t being managed by Roy Hodgson and
- a 4th series of Peaky Blinders has been commissioned.
Could be worse.
Snore rooms anyone?
Frazzy moans about my snoring
I bought one of those ‘Snore wizards’ off of the TV, it didn’t work. I’ve tried tying my jaw shut with the belt of my dressing gown, that doesn’t work. I’ve considered giving up drink and losing weight but my commitment only goes so far.
Which is why I was relieved to read that I am not alone. The Telegraph informing us this week that the latest real estate trend is to have a dedicated “Snoring room”.
Estate agents Knight Frank announcing they are the latest must have in an attempt to preserve marital harmony.
Larders as well apparently.
Ben’s guide to larders
Now as an obsessive foodie I would kill for a larder. I remember when even council houses had them. I grew up in two such properties.
If you are too young to know what this is then I’ll describe it. Basically a larder is space, often called a ‘Pantry’ somewhere between a cupboard and a small room that is cooled by brick and tiles, preferably North facing we are told, that serves as a storage space, warmer than a fridge but cooler than an airing cupboard where you can keep fresh stuff without it going off.
Its where your chutneys and pickles best survive. It’s a walk in wardrobe for people who prefer Gammon to Gucci, Typhoo to Jimmy Choo, Dulce y Banana to Dolce and Gabana (did you see what I did there?)
I love this quote from the article:
“Young people are moving away from shoving everything in a fridge and opting for a more naturally temperature-controlled solution.”
Obviously when you aren’t drowning in a refugee boat off the coast of Italy this is the kind of thing that occupies your time.
What about a Dog Shower?
According to the article dog showers are also in high demand.
Our own mutt, a Working Cocker Spaniel specifically bred for mud exploration has to be dragged into the shower after a run out, with all the enthusiasm of Mussolini approaching that final lamppost, so a dedicated shower might be just the thing. Catherine Prout commenting:
“Our dogs love to roll around in horse muck, so being able to clean them in the depths of winter in hot water I felt was a must,” says Prout, whose doggy wet room has a raised platform the full width of the room with a tiled shower where the retrievers take it in turn to bathe.”
Adding
“We recently fitted an Aga in a dog shower room so the dogs could dry off before they come into the kitchen, where the main Aga was installed”
Now Catherine, an Aga to dry your dog is God’s way of letting you know that you have as much grasp of reality as Marie Antoinette appearing in an episode of “Made in Chelsea”.
Lets search out a story with a bit more gravitas and no, Gravitas is not a new Tapas bar in Hoxton.
WHO did you say?
I had to reach for my Ventolin inhaler when I discovered that I actually agree with a Conservative MP when I read of Bob Blackman’s support for government plans to usher in the Homelessness Reduction Bill, the aim of which is to bring Britain in line with Europe (Oops, here we go) and place a statutory duty upon local authorities to deal with homeless people before they officially become homeless people
Homelessness prevention has been part of the statutory landscape for years in actuality but this ‘Crisis’ backed plan aims to go further and encourage officers out from behind the desk and into the properties where people are living in places so horrific that they don’t even have an Aga to dry their dog. Imagine that?
I’ve never heard of Bob Blackman MP before so I went on Wikipedia to learn that not only is he championing this sensible solution but that also he is a strong proponent of plain packaging for cigarettes, another issue that gets my vote, feeling as I do that tobacco should be put in the same camp as Heroin and Hydrochloric acid.
Unfortunately I also learnt that he has also been ordered to pay back money in inaccurate expenses claims, is against gay marriage and is a member of ‘Conservative friends of Israel’, which slides him right back down the snake to ‘Go’ in my book.
Close the door quietly on your way out.
Close but no cigar Bob, we won’t be picking out curtains or sharing a matey pint any time soon but thanks for the homelessness support. At least you have one fully functioning brain cell.
The town that has too many affordable homes
Here’s a weird one while we are all concerned with a housing shortage New Zealand has a problem where there are too many affordable houses and no takers to fill the 1,000+ jobs going in the area of Clutha District.
Some things are the same as the UK when Clutha mayor says:
“So many of the things Kiwis value, such as owning your own home and providing for your family, have become an impossible dream. For a lot of people in New Zealand life is just an endless slog. And that really saddens me.”
13,000 miles away, you have a housing glut, we have a housing shortage but the bottom line remains the same, the quality of ordinary people’s lives getting screwed over by an economy controlled by a system dictated by an arrogant ruling elite from both the right and the left. Its about money not politics.
Damn!!!!! I knew I wouldn’t get through this piece without coming back to what I think.
What made me smile this week
I’ve been doing contract work for a homelessness unit and by Wednesday two of my clients had attempted suicide because they didn’t pass the homelessness tests and a colleague was followed home and threatened with a gun for the same reason.
I went into a meltdown of guilt and anger for a few days which evaporated just walking me dog and watching him bound through the long grass without a care in the world.
There is more to life than being beset with human misery and being responsible for people’s lives.
Hell……like I say, at least I’m not managed by Roy Hodgson.
See ya next week.